Monday, July 30, 2007

My Birthday

I know my birthday isn't for another eight months but I had to put word on the street: I am having a 27 on the 27th birthday celebration. I want you all to come. I am putting it on blast now b/c the plan is to have a weekend long event--VIP at whatever club is popping at the time, brunch on Saturday and a trip to the spa (sleepover at Chateau Elan). Please put some money to the side so you can afford my celebration! You can't say you didn't know about it b/c I am letting you know 7 months and 29 days in advance!

Sunday, July 29, 2007

My Random Thoughts for Today

Why does it feel so right sometimes and then other days it just doesn't? Right now it feels right but that could be because he put a smile on my face--a really big one :)

I am worried about you! Stop taking that! You are worth so much more. I can't make you love you, only you can do that. I honestly don't see you loving you. Remember if you don't love you, no one else can.

Thanks for calling me back! It is great reconnecting with you. Too bad some b.s. brought us back together. Actually when I sent you the email in January it stemmed from the same person.

Are all little kids bad? Am I wrong to know that when I have kids they are going to feel the wrath of mommy. This weekend my little cousins were visiting my house. The youngest decided to tell my grandmother to shut her mouth. Do you know that little heffa (yes I spelled it that way--had to get my point across) got popped on the hand and then her father told her you don't talk to adults like that. These same people used to spank (i.e. beat) me if I said what instead of yes when my name was called.

Ladies check out Suze Orman's book about women and money. The plan seems too simple but I think it works.

Anybody want to chip in on my down payment for a new car?

I have never given birth but looking at my mother and some other mothers I wonder how can you be a part-time parent.

Do your parents have favorite children? If so, do the children that aren't favorite children have a healthy relationship with your parents?

Why feel the need to be faithful if you aren't in a relationship with the person?

How do you just disappear? Since you disappeared will you have the nerve to reappear?

How do you think I called 911? I left your side for maybe 5 minutes and I didn't have a phone with me when I left.

Why is it so hard to let go of some people and others you can let go just like that?

Taboo is fun but please learn how to read! The word is lobby not library! Hilarious!

Monday, July 23, 2007

Being Content and Random

Have you ever done something because someone else wanted you to do? I have done that a lot in my life but now that I am "grown" I feel that I have the right to be content, happy, estatic, etc. I just graduated from law school and I don't have a job. I don't have a job b/c I want to be etc. I have a job offer that would bring me nothing but tears and heartache.

I am fed up with a certain someone telling me I shouldn't settle. If I interviewed for the job I obviously want it. I am sorry you think that I should make a certain amount and that job doesn't pay that amount. I am happy with the thought of having that job.

I am tired of you saying I don't understand my accomplishments. I completely and totally understand what I accomplished when I walked across that stage May 19th. That is my biggest accomplishment thus far. I struggled through law school and sometimes wondered whether it was for me. That is why I know what my accomplishments were. I struggled to pay bills and you were nowhere to be found when I NEEDED something in law school--so don't tell me I don't understand my accomplishments. I have a law degree--there were people who started with me and didn't finish. I understand more than you will ever know.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Randomness

Have you ever heard someone say something so stupid--"Living a wonderful lifestyle like the ones you read about on TV." WTF?

Why are you trife? Have you always been that way? Were you ever my friend? Do you have any real friends? I was ride or die. You make me wonder do your lies create your bad situation.

What is up with my friends and men? I have noticed that most of my friends with two degrees are manless but the ones with one degree are happily married or getting ready to walk down the aisle. Does that mean I need to give UGA my degree back to get married?

Are you really happy with more than one man but no relationship?

Am I really happy with status quo?

If I wanted a cut friend you would not be it--what we had didn't work and I personally don't think your current girlfriend would appreciate me cozying up to her man (she really doesn't know what she got herself into--I am not the one to tell her especially since she doesn't "know me from a can of paint" (damn Bridezillas).)

So what kind of person are you that you can't send a rejection letter? I have learned a lot about lack of professionalism in the past couple of months from you.

Thank you God for my sisters and friends. I think I have more sisters than friends--thank you all for listening to my dramatics. If you didn't know I love you all. I want to especially thank T.B. and A.G. for listening to me talk about absolutely nothing. If you ever need me you know how to reach me.

I have a job interview and I really want this job.

I miss D.H. If only we lived in the same state.

Shouldn't you question your relationship when the man tells you specifically not to tell a certain person about the relationship? Why do you two have different versions of the relationship? Did you know he just broke up with his girlfriend and had been trying to get back with her while you two were talking for years?

Monday, July 9, 2007

Frustration

I am so frustrated and I don't want to be. I feel like a failure b/c I have a law degree and a license to practice law but I can't find a job that I want to go to. I graduated from law school in December and I still have no job. I am trying to stay positive but it is difficult. My mother is driving me crazy b/c she is borderline crazy. I had an interview in March that I thought went well especially since the interviewer said I did well but I haven't heard from her. I know most people would give up hope but I take people at their word and I have communicated with her. She said she would contact me and she still hasn't. I suspect that I know why and it has something to do with my overzealous mother. I think even though my mother wants me to have a job she still wants to sabotage me. I think she wants me to live at home for the rest of my life and the thought of that brings me to tears. I want to get out of this house so bad but I don't have a job that will allow me to do so. I cannot live with my father b/c he drives me crazy as well. I am just fed up with him b/c he still makes promises that he has no intention of keeping. Why don't they just understand that I want to be left alone. I have said this on numerous occassions and no one listens. I really hate when mos people ask me if I have a job. I haven't done anything since February 28th. If I had a job the world would know. I don't mind people asking about the job search but don't just outright say, "Do you have a job yet?" Then my dad has the nerve to say you are not really looking for a job b/c you are not pounding the pavement. Last time I checked people today are applying for jobs via the internet. You hope somebody contacts you but I haven't been so lucky. I just want a job and I want to leave this house. I pray about it regularly but I think my mother and father are driving me crazy and making me feel worse. My dad also says you are taking a much needed break. I don't need a 5 month break with no money. That is not my idea of a break. I am just tired and I want to have a job that allows me to pay my bills and doesn't put a frown on my face. I have a job offer but I would have to live at home and I would complain about it daily (I worked there last summer so I know).

Sunday, July 8, 2007

My Random Thoughts of the Past Week

1. On the 4th I was listening to the radio and I just didn't want to hear music so I turned to a talk radio show (I was listening to Al Sharpton--mistake #1 I guess). The show was about black men and polygamy. So the person on Al's show agreed with black men practicing polygamy and at this point I was livid. I tried to listen but the quote that I must paraphrase made me reach for the dial, "The problem with men and promiscuity is that we don't allow men to monopolize and control women." I wish I could say that I dreamed this statement up but I had a friend in the car and we discussed the b.s. behind this statement. The woman said that the black community would be better if black men were allowed to be polygamous b/c more people would have fathers in their homes. I disagree with this because from what I have seen men don't want to be married. They just want to have unprotected sex with numerous women and women allow it to happen. Do you really think a man would marry if he can do what he wants to do without marriage?

2. What the hell was this weekend? Did you have to tell such an elaborate story? I appreciate how your lies have brought some other friends close together.

3. Things you shouldn't do in church--clean your ears out. Why do you have q-tips at church and even if you do should you really be cleaning your ears out?

4. Why don't I write stuff down--I have the worst short term memory ever and whenever I go shopping I can't remember what I need when I go to the store.

5. What happens to your career when you appear on ANTM? I was just watching TV and I saw one of those chicks in a Chili's commercial. I can't think of her name but she has lupus--shouldn't her career be doing better or does placing your career in Tyra's hand just mean a quick end to your career?

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Why You Gotta Be Trife?

I have this former friend who is just trifling for no reason. I will be honest--she played me and one of my friends. I hate the fact that I was stupid enough to allow this person to take me for granted. I know that what I did was out of the kindness of my heart and her sob story was crazy but it made you feel completely sorry for her. It was so crazy that you didn't want to share it with anybody but once you did you realize that you had been taken for a ride. If I had to do it all over again I would probably do the same thing. With that being said don't attempt to play me for a fool because this friend messed it up for everyone. Don't ask me for anything unless you have a sworn affidavit and at least two witnesses. Also you will be signing a contract that will be binding. It is so sad that I have to give that disclaimer but if you know what happened you would give the same one. Thanks to my sistafriends for the words of encouragement and getting to the bottom of this one.