Monday, July 9, 2007

Frustration

I am so frustrated and I don't want to be. I feel like a failure b/c I have a law degree and a license to practice law but I can't find a job that I want to go to. I graduated from law school in December and I still have no job. I am trying to stay positive but it is difficult. My mother is driving me crazy b/c she is borderline crazy. I had an interview in March that I thought went well especially since the interviewer said I did well but I haven't heard from her. I know most people would give up hope but I take people at their word and I have communicated with her. She said she would contact me and she still hasn't. I suspect that I know why and it has something to do with my overzealous mother. I think even though my mother wants me to have a job she still wants to sabotage me. I think she wants me to live at home for the rest of my life and the thought of that brings me to tears. I want to get out of this house so bad but I don't have a job that will allow me to do so. I cannot live with my father b/c he drives me crazy as well. I am just fed up with him b/c he still makes promises that he has no intention of keeping. Why don't they just understand that I want to be left alone. I have said this on numerous occassions and no one listens. I really hate when mos people ask me if I have a job. I haven't done anything since February 28th. If I had a job the world would know. I don't mind people asking about the job search but don't just outright say, "Do you have a job yet?" Then my dad has the nerve to say you are not really looking for a job b/c you are not pounding the pavement. Last time I checked people today are applying for jobs via the internet. You hope somebody contacts you but I haven't been so lucky. I just want a job and I want to leave this house. I pray about it regularly but I think my mother and father are driving me crazy and making me feel worse. My dad also says you are taking a much needed break. I don't need a 5 month break with no money. That is not my idea of a break. I am just tired and I want to have a job that allows me to pay my bills and doesn't put a frown on my face. I have a job offer but I would have to live at home and I would complain about it daily (I worked there last summer so I know).

1 comment:

Myra said...

It will all work out, honey! Trust in God that it will!

I started job hunting back in October, and didn't start getting solid feedback, i.e. interviews until a few weeks ago. Of course, I had already accepted a prestigious fellowship to Rutgers, so I had to decline.

Hopefully, my dream job will be out there when I start the job search again in a few months!

In times like these, I remember this passage from the Bible:

Proverbs 3:5,6 - Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.